Friday, January 31, 2014

Things That Make Me Smile 1/31/14

Jake (8), Alyssa (5½), Zac (4), Tyler (1½) 


Happy Friday! It's a big list this week, so let's Smile!


1. Alyssa: "I don't want to clean my room. There's a multitude of toys."

2. Me, after giving him something: "How about thank you, Zac?"
Zac: "Thank you, Zac."

3.  Jake: "I watched an Angry Birds Toons once that was a Halloween one. There was a bird that was dressed up with an axe sticking out of his head."
Me: "Eww, that's morbid."
Jake: "Morbid? Who's he?"

4.

5. Me: "Oh, Tyler."
Alyssa: "What did he do this time?"

6. Jake: "I want a bread sandwich."
Me: "A bread sandwich?"
Jake: "Yeah, it's just 3 pieces of bread."

7. Zac, at night, about a lit-up flag: "I saw an American flag! And it glows in the dark!"

8. Zac: "I wish we could live at Gramma's."
Me: "You do? Why?"
Zac: "So we could see Gramma all the time! . . . And so Papa could go to the store and buy us doughnuts."

9. Me: "You guys have quite the mess out here."
Jake, appreciatively: "Thank you."
10. Helping daddy make breakfast.

11. Zac, a few minutes after waking up: "I'm hungry. I think I want candy."

12. Alyssa, singing: "Hark the herald angels sing, glory to the newborn king. Peace on earth and mercy smiled . . ."  

13. Alyssa: "Mom, I think we have more marbles than you now, because you've been losing yours!"

14. Jake: "Is my hair getting brown?"
Me: "No, it's still blond. It's just not as light as it used to be. It is getting darker."
Jake: {sad face} "I want it to stay blond, like Dad's."
Me: "You're going to end up with brown hair and blue eyes. Like your mommy."
Jake: "Ugh."
Me: "What's wrong with being a little like your mommy? You already have your daddy's face."
Jake: "Ok. I'm good then."

15. Jake: "Zachary! Just because you can throw things, doesn't mean you have the freedom to throw them at my Legos."


What made you Smile this week?
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Friday, January 24, 2014

Things That Make Me Smile 1/24/14

Jake (8), Alyssa (5½), Zac (4), Tyler (1½) 


Happy Friday! We got great news at Tyler's 6-month checkup for his ears this week. Everything is looking great--no wax build up, no infections, and the tubes are working well and still in place! He is officially over all of the complications from last year. We are very thankful that he is staying healthy this winter. I hope you got some great, smiley news this week, too.


 
1. Zac, looking at our Roman numeral clock: "Look, it's V o'clock."

2. Me: "Zac, is this yours?"
Zac: "No, it's mine."

3. Every single picture in this post. Every one.

4. Jake: "For some reason, my feet feel excited."
 
5. I was talking to Leighton when Tyler grabbed the phone and ran off. "Hi! Daddy!" He sure does love his daddy.

6. Me: "I need to do some laundry."
Zac: "I'll do laundry with you so it goes faster."

7. Going on an all-day date alone with Leighton, while my parents watched the kids.

8. Me: "Who made this mess, Ty?"
Tyler: "Daddy."
Me: "Oh, Daddy did it?"
Tyler: "Mmhmm."

9. Alyssa, because Tyler scribbled on her paper: "Try to show a little more respect."

10. Alyssa: "I think God is the best colorer ever."

11. Zac, after a firetruck drove by: "Mom! Fighter-fighters are real!"

12. Alyssa: "I'm very, very, very hot. But I'm also very cold."


What made you smile this week?


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Sunday, January 19, 2014

MUD!

I was looking for a specific picture for a post that I'm working on and realized that I never shared these from early May of 2012.


The weather was starting to warm up, the rain had ceased, 2-week-old Tyler had just gone down for a nap, and the other kids and I headed outside to enjoy the sunshine. 

Our big plastic playset had killed a small portion of grass underneath it and left a nice mucky mess after our April showers.  Of course, one of the boys quickly found the mud. 

After all, boys are drawn to mud like a man to the smell of bacon.

One boy turned into two, and then a little girl joined in the fun. 


They squished the mud and jumped in it. They made mud balls and threw them at each other. Zac was the target of most of the ammunition, but he didn't mind. He laughed every time it hit him. He licked his face over and over and said, "Mmm, dat yummy!" 

His gets his refined palate from his daddy.


They played for 2 hours in the mud, laughing and squealing. I stayed out of the line of fire and happily captured the moments on camera.

I wasn't worried about the muddy clothes; I was delighting in their fun. Clothes and bodies can be washed, but childhood can never be repeated.



One thing that never crossed my mind while they were playing though? How upset their daddy would be when he got home and saw a huge mud hole in the yard. The little patch of dirt, where the playset had been, quickly grew into a 6-foot circle of clumpy, gunky, icky, goopy mud. 

Oops.

It took that entire summer (and my diligently keeping the children out of the area) for our grass to grow back. 

Thankfully, it didn't take that long for my hubby to forgive me. 


I still think about this day and smile. Their smiles in these pictures are priceless. The memories, even more so. The joy they had in playing in the mud is so precious to me.

And the pictures are pretty cute, too.

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Friday, January 17, 2014

Things That Make Me Smile 1/17/14

Jake (8), Alyssa (5½), Zac (4), Tyler (1½)


Happy Friday! This week has been fun: gum in Alyssa' hair, an exploding garbage disposal, spilled mess in the pantry, and the typical shenanigans from Tyler. We also spent a lot of time purging and reorganizing. 

Did you have a good week, too? Share a smile with us!


1. Jake: "Tyler's so crazy it's like there's a chipmunk running around in his head."

2. Zac, after I kissed him: "Ooh, we got married!"

3. Alyssa, watching the garbage men: "Oh, no! They're taking all our garbage!"

4. Zac: "You're making french toast? Aawww! I love you."

5. Listening to Leighton read the kids their bedtime story.


6. Zac: "Tyler, wanna be my new friend?"
Tyler: "Uh huh."
Jake: "Hey, Ty-ty, wanna be my new friend?"
Zac: "No!"
Jake: "Hey, Ty-ty, wanna be my new friend?"
Tyler: "Rawr."
Zac: "I think rawr means no."

7. Jake was reminiscing and used the words "when I was a kid."

8. Zac, after watching Leighton drill holes in the wall: "Daddy, why are there two little holes in the wall?"

9. Jake: "Mom, have you unlocked your true potential yet?"

10. Watching Jake use the fork part of my salad tongs as a back scratcher.

11. Jake: "Haven't you heard that old saying, 'If you touch fire, you'll regret it. If you don't regret it, you're toast.'"
Me "And who said that?"
Jake: "Me. I just made it up."

12. Jake: "You're as old as pineapple, Alyssa."

13. Alyssa: "I'm never trying milk mixed with water. It probably tastes like compost."


What made you smile this week?

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Thursday, January 16, 2014

How To Remove Gum From Hair


A few minutes after Alyssa woke up this morning, she frantically said, "Mom, there's gum in my hair!"

That is not something you want to hear, especially from your little girl with long hair.

"Why did you sleep with gum in your mouth? Why didn't you spit it out before bed?"

"I did spit it out! I know I did," she insisted.

Uh huh, then why is it there in your hair? That's what I was thinking, but instead, I sent her to the bathroom. As I pulled the rest of her hair out of the way, I asked again, "Why didn't you spit it out? How did you brush your teeth with gum in your mouth?"

And again, she was adamant, "I know I spit it out. I remember. I leaned over and my hair fell in my face . . . and, uh . . . I thought I pulled my hair back . . ." she trailed off.

"Ah," I said, "so you probably spit it out right into your hair." 


And there it was--a big glob of root beer gum, deeply matted in the hair by her ear.

I grabbed my jar of coconut oil that I keep in the bathroom for beauty purposes and took about a dime-sized amount. I wasn't sure if it would work. I know that it can be used to remove sticky substances and the fact that it is an oil made me believe that it would help the hair slide off.

I started to work the thickened oil into the mess of hair and gum. Almost immediately, the gum softened and started to stretch. I was able to gently separate the hair as I pulled the gum out in two parts.

And we were done!


Start to finish was less than two minutes.

And the best part? There were no tears, not an ouch, or even a wince. In fact, she said, "You're done already? That was easy!"

Super easy. And the coconut oil is even good for her hair. Double bonus.

We washed her hair and she ran off to play. And to tell her brothers to check out the gross gum gunk on the counter.


So, if you have a run in with spit in-slept in-gum-in-hair, try some coconut oil.

And then you, too, can brag about the gunk on your counter.

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Friday, January 10, 2014

Things That Make Me Smile 1/10/14

Jake (8), Alyssa (5½), Zac (4), Tyler (1½)


Happy Friday! This week, we finished up the favorite quotes of 2012 for Kids Say the Funniest Things with parts, 8, 9, and 10. If you missed out, and like reading funny things, you should click over and read some .  .  . after you read this week's Smiles, of course!

1. Jake: "I hate the smell of static."

2. Alyssa, running her hand through her hair: "I can brush my hair whenever I want. I always have my special brush with me."

3. Alyssa: "Daddy buys you flowers because you're pretty and he loves you."


4. Zac, when I turned the light on in the morning: "The too bright was trying to burn my eyes."

5. Tyler got into the all-purpose flour before I could stop him. As soon as he shoved the handful into his mouth, he made an awful face and said, "gucky." I don't think hell be trying flour again anytime soon. 

6. Zac, after he woke up: "Mom, today I'm going to cuddle with you!" 

7. 

8. Alyssa: "One day, I had a most unusual dream. It was about Alton Brown's cooking show."

9. Jake, while turning on Disney's Robin Hood: "Remember, it starts not not very exciting. Then it gets so exciting that your head pops off."


What made you smile this week?

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Thursday, January 9, 2014

Kids Say the Funniest Things: Part 10

Here is the final list of Kids Say the Funniest Things from 2012! Thank you for walking down Memory Lane with me.

Jake 6, Alyssa 4, Zac 2, Tyler newborn



SEPTEMBER
Alyssa: "I know everything about getting married."
Me: "You do? Can you tell me about it?"
Alyssa: "You have to wear a white dress. And you have to have flowers. And you need someone to marry. And you need music . . . Oh, and you need a wedding hat! I forgot about that." 

Zac: "When I close my eyes, I see people. They're in my eyeballs. They're walking around in my eyeballs."
Leighton: "They're in your dreams."
Zac: "Yeah, but they're walking around in my eyeballs." 

Alyssa, while praying: ". . . the end." 
Jake: "You mean amen."
Alyssa: "Right. Amen." 

Jake, after listening to a description in a book: "Ok, I pictured it. In black and white, too. I can also do it in movie and cartoon." 

Zac: "May I have more cheese?"
Me: "More cheese?"
Zac: "Yes. I have the power to eat a lot. And to be the fasterest." 


Alyssa: "Usually if I'm watching a movie and the disc freezes, I just smack my head and it works."

Zac: "Where are my big Legos?"
Me, pointing to the middle of the room: "Right there."
Zac: "That's a good hiding place!"


Jake, about Tyler: "He's an expert at making slobber bubbles."

Zac: "There's a bug on the cushion!"
My Mom: "That's ok, just brush it off."
Zac, takes off running and returns a couple minutes later: "I can't find a brush anywhere."
 
Alyssa: "I'm sillier than I thought I would be."

Jake, commanding: "Stop chewing with food in your mouth, Alyssa."

Me: "Zac, don't pick your nose."
Zac: "But I'm trying to get that thing that's up there."
    
OCTOBER
Jake: "My nose tells me what's for dinner."

Zac, coming in my room in the middle of the night: "Why aren't you on your bicle (bicycle)?"
Me: "Because I'm sleeping."
Zac: "Oh. And they're aren't aliens in your room either!"


Zac: "Tyler bless you-ed in my face."

Alyssa, wearing big fuzzy earmuffs in the house: "I'm wearing these just in case Tyler cries a lot." 

Zac: "Can you take your scarecrow and put him downstairs so we don't see him?"
Me: "But he's my friend."
Zac: "He can be your friend downstairs." 

Me: "Are you sure you're done? I can't take you potty every 5 seconds."
Zac, innocently: "How about 4 seconds?"

Zac, stepping on a scale: "Six! Yes! I did it!"
Me: "Good job! {looking at the scale} Twenty-nine."
Zac: "Why twenty-nine?"
Me: "Because that's how much you weigh?"
Zac, pressing on the scale: "Mommy, how do I get it to the top? {talks to scale} You, bully! Go to the top!"
 
Jake, looking at Lego sets: "This set comes with Hansel."
Me: "It's Han Solo."
Jake: "Why is he solo? He has Chewbacca."


Alyssa: "I'm a better sister than Jacob." 

Jake: "This tag says that I have waterproof boots."
Alyssa: "Jacob, you are one lucky boy!"
Jake: "Do you know what waterproof means?"
Alyssa: "No."

Alyssa: "I know a karate move. If someone tries to hit you, you just try getting away."

Zac, about Tyler: "Is he pretty?"
Alyssa: "He's gorgeous. That's a fancier word for pretty."
Zac: "Yeah, he's gorgeous."


NOVEMBER
Me: "When was the last time you had it?"
Alyssa: "Well, I didn't have it the day after yesterday."

Alyssa: "Do mommy cats lay eggs?"
Me: "No."
Alyssa: "Oh, they just lay babies?"

Zac: "I don't like water. It's fake."

Zac was sitting on my lap while I was looking at things on the computer. As I closed one tab to go to another, he said, "Hey! I was 'bout to read dat!"

Alyssa: "I am the queen of dumping toys out."
Zac: "No, I am the queen."

Alyssa was helping me give Tyler a bath in his tub in the sink when he started peeing. It shot up in the air and across the room like a fountain. Alyssa's eyes got big and she said, "Whoa! That was awesome!"

Jake: "How do you say taco in Spanish?"

Zac, wearing Leighton's shoes: "Look, I'm Mr. Daddy."

Alyssa picked up a piece of foam pretend wood and said, "This is so arbitrary." 
  
Jake, to Tyler: "You're my favorite boy. For now at least."

Jake: "I know why Jesus likes people being right-handed, because you're supposed to do the right things."

Me: "I need to sweep again. I already swept once, but baby Tyler made a mess everywhere."
Alyssa, looking around, finally pointing: "He didn't make a mess there."

Me: "Do you know how much I love you?"
Zac: "Big."
Me: "That's right, big. How much do you love me?"
Zac: "Bigger!"

Alyssa: "Baby talk for saying yes is gla."

Me: "Go get dressed so we can go to the library."
Alyssa: "I better not wear squeaky shoes 'cause you have to be quiet in the library."
  
Alyssa: "This is California. We all live in California." {puts her hand to the side of her mouth and whispers} "I'm just pretending. This is just a game. I know, we actually live in Earth, but I'm pretending it's California."

Jake: "Did Grandma like that when she was a kid?"
Alyssa: "Grandma was never a kid." 


DECEMBER
Me, reading a book title: "The Ultimate Natural Detox Guide.
Jake: "Mmm, that sounds good."

While playing hide-n-seek:

Jake, standing at the top of the stairs: "Hey, are you down there?"
Zac, standing behind the door at the top the stairs: "Yes!" 
 
I was making breakfast and dropped some food on the floor. Alyssa said, "That's ok. Tyler will get it." 

Alyssa: "I know how to spell Erika: M - O - M."
  
Jake: "When can you buy toothpaste for me that tastes like meat?"

Me: "Who ate something minty?"
Alyssa: "Not me."
Zac: "Not me"
Me, sniffing: "I smell something minty. Who ate something?"
Kids: "Not me."
Me, sniffing Zac's mouth: "You smell minty. What did you eat?"
Zac: "It's chastick."
Me: "Ohhh, you put on chapstick."
Zac: "Yeah. And it didn't taste good when I ate it."
 
Alyssa: "Do you remember my husband's name?"
Jake: "No."
Alyssa: "Hmm, I don't quite remember either."  
  
Alyssa: "I did it on accident or on purpose. I don't remember which one."

Jake: "I got a lot of reasons, but I'll only tell you one because I don't know the rest."

Zac, while watching our neighbor's snow blower: "It's a snow sprinkler!"

Alyssa: "I'm never going to do that. Not in my whooole life. Not until I turn 6."


And that's the end of review for 2012! I'll share some of my favorite from 2013 soon, but if you're looking for more funny now, check out parts 1-9 of Kids Say the Funniest Things.


 
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Sunday, January 5, 2014

Kids Say the Funniest Things: Part 9

I am thoroughly enjoying reading through these Smiles again. Some of them I can remember very vividly, where they took place, what exactly we were doing. Others though, I don't remember at all. How grateful I am for these lists! 

Here is part nine, the summary of our favorite quotes from the middle months of 2012.

Jake 6, Alyssa 4, Zac 2, Tyler newborn


MAY
Zac asked to kiss baby Tyler. He was standing on the side of me that was holding Tyler's feet. As I leaned down so Zac could reach him, he said, "Not the bottom!" 

Jake: "Why are you still eating if you're full? I know. You stomach is full, but your mind is still hungry."

Alyssa was practicing writing her letters. After a few minutes she said, "I never get tired of making Ss!" A few minutes later she said,  "I never get tired of Ss, but I sure do get tired of lower case As!"

We were preparing to leave church when Alyssa started to panic. "Where's my purse? Where's my purse??? Where's my purse?!?" My mom calmly answered, "It's on your shoulder."

Jake: "I wonder how far away the moon is. I think it's higher than 100 feet."

Jake loves making up his own jokes.
Jake: "Why was the house on the stove?"
Me: "I don't know. Why?"
Jake: "Because 'Home, Home on the Range.' You know, since range is another word for stove."

Jake, talking about Tyler: "He doesn't do much, but he sure is cute."

Jake: "God can't flood the earth again. He can flood a state or something, but not the whole earth. He promised."
Alyssa: "Did He cross His heart?"

Zac asked for cake for breakfast as soon as he woke up. When I told him no, he said, "Mommy, be nice. You be nice to me."

I heard a frantic "Mommy! Help me!!!" I ran into the bathroom and froze. I debated if I had time to run back out and grab my camera, but the look on Zac's face made me help him instead. He was hanging upside down in the air. His shorts caught on the drawer knob as he was climbing down off the counter. It was one of the funniest things I have ever seen.


JUNE
Jake: "What could you buy with 3 houses full of money?"
Leighton: "You could buy just about anything with it."
Jake: "I bet you could buy just about anything, but you couldn't buy your way into Heaven."

Alyssa, laughing: "Tyler spit up and he's smiling. He's so proud of himself!"

Jake, talking about the lines on his wrist: "This is where God sewed my hand to my arm before I was born."  

Alyssa, while brushing her hair: "Look, I'm giving my hair a re-do."

Me: "I don't think so."
Alyssa: "Uh huh. Jacob told me."
Me: "And Jacob knows everything?"
Alyssa: "Yes. Well . . . Jacob thinks he knows everything."
  
Zac: "Rarrrrrr! Rarrrrrr! RAAARRRRR!!! I'm a turtle."  

Zac, pointing to his middle: "This is my buttley bellon."
  
Jake, talking about Tyler: "He's so, so cute. I just want to rip his head off so I can keep it with me and look at it all the time."

Alyssa: "What is this?"
Me: "Heavy whipping cream."
Alyssa, lifting it above her head: "It doesn't feel heavy to me."

Jake: "What kind of job should I have?"
Me: "Whatever job God wants you to have."
Jake: "I hope He doesn't want me to go to outer space. All you do is stick a flag in the ground and come home. That's no fun."

Alyssa: "Is 29 a real number?"


JULY
Jake: "I think I know why God gave cobras those big, sharp teeth. To look cool. And to impress Adam and Eve."

Alyssa, in the middle of the night, crying because of a bad dream. "I did something really, really, really bad. I touched a triangle. And ate it."  

Jake wanted to help me mop the floor, so I showed him how to use the twist mop.
Me: "Ok, now you show me how to do it."
Jake, innocently: "But I thought you already knew how."

Alyssa handed me something while we were standing in the bathroom. As I set it down on the counter, it fell onto the floor. I said, "Oops, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to drop that." She said, "That's ok. You didn't drop it. The counter did."  

I left the room for 30 seconds and came back to find the baby's head all sparkly. I asked, "Zac, what did you put on Tyler's head?" "Butter," he answered. Butter? I picked up Alyssa's cream lip gloss that was lying on the floor nearby. "This?" I asked. He excitedly responded, "Yes, butter!"

The kids were pretending to be Master Shifu from Kung Fu Panda by hanging a spaghetti noodle under their noses. We were all laughing until Zac started making funny noises and wrinkling his nose. He had just taken a drink, so I thought he got juice up his nose. As it turned out, it was his noodle! Leighton held open Zac's nostril and tried to grab the noodle. We watched as it popped out of his nose a bit, got sucked back in, popped out, sucked in, over and over again as Zac laughed. I tried tweezers, but they just broke off bits of the noodle. He kept making a gargling sound because the noodle was so far in his nose and tickling his throat. Finally, he sneezed a few times, sending the noodle out his nose a few inches and shooting noodle-snot right into my hair. Leighton instantly pulled the goopy noodle out. We were all laughing so hard. After all, it's not every day you get a 5-inch noodle up your nose!    

Jake: "Homesick is when you're home for a long time and you really want to leave, but you just can't."

Alyssa: "Grandma, when are you gonna have kids?"
My Mom: "I'm all done having kids."
Alyssa: "What happened?!?"

Alyssa: "Mommy, can we make a tree house on the ground?"
Jake: "Then it wouldn't be a tree house."
Alyssa: "Mommy, can we make a ground house on the ground?"

Jake: "If Superman were real, he wouldn't stand a chance against Jesus."  

Jake and Alyssa each had a piece of gum, so naturally, Zac wanted a piece too.
Me: "Chew, chew chew. Don't swallow it. Chew, chew chew."
Zac, seconds later: "I did it!"
Me: "Where is your gum?"
Zac, with mouth wide open: "All gone!"
He was quite proud of himself for chewing so well before swallowing.

Zac: "I want my hair to be wike Daddy's when I'm huger."

We were at someone's house when Alyssa had to use the bathroom. Concerned, she said, "They have their toilet paper on backwards." She then proceeded to take it off to turn it around. I stopped her and explained that it wasn't our house. As she was drying her hands after washing them, she said, "I wonder when they're going to fix that."

Jake and Alyssa were playing superheroes. They had blanket capes and paper logos taped to their shirts.
Zac: "I'm superhero too!
Jake: "No, you're not."
Me: "That's not nice. He can be a superhero, too."
Jake: "Mom, he's our sidekick. He's just a rookie."
  

AUGUST
Zac: "I asked God to turn me into a turtle."

Zac: "I was chasing me by myself."

Jake: "The place is deserted? Like there are desserts there?"

Jake: "Why is it called Pennsylvania? Do they make a lot of pencils there?"

Zac, while eating outside: "There's too many bugs! We need to put them in jail!"

Jake, after giving Tyler a kiss: "His lips are soggy."

Zac, fluttering his eyelashes: "My eyes can hop."

My mom and Zac have a thing where she pinches his butt and calls them her "little buns." Zac always laughs. If she asks, Whose little buns are these?" he'll answer, "Brama's!" If she forgets to pinch them, he'll tease her. "Brama, I got your little buns!" She was pinching him and asked the question, "Whose little buns are these?" But instead of his usual response, he said, "Zachy's!" After she feigned disappointment, dejected he said, "Ok, you can have one."  

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Saturday, January 4, 2014

Things That Make Me Smile 1/3/14

Jake (8), Alyssa (5½), Zac (4), Tyler (1½)

Happy Weekend! The holidays are over and things are starting to calm down around here. (Well, calm down as much as a house of littles can, ha.) We've been trying to get the house back in order, putting the decorations away and finding homes for all the new presents. And while I have  only a couple funny and cute quotes from this past week, we did share in many, many Smiles.  

1. Leighton: "Do you remember that?"
Zac, nodding: "I think it was yesterday. Or tomorrow."

2. Spending New Year's Eve at my parents' with my brother and his family. We always eat the same meal every year: lobster tails, crab legs, shrimp, filet mignon, hasselback potatoes, and Texas rolls. And we always play Apples to Apples.

3. Leighton and I and the kids also spend the night at my parents' on New Year's Eve every year and then spend the next day with them.

4. Taking Alyssa to get her ears pierced.

5. When I was younger, my mom and I had a tradition of splitting a Cinnabon when we went to the mall. After Alyssa had her ears pierced, we carried on that tradition with the three of us.

6. Jake: "Mom, you're pretty and cute. You're not as cute as Tyler but you're pretty cute."

7. Reading over past Smiles with the kids to gather ones for my latest list of Kids Say the Funniest Things and listening to them laugh hysterically at their younger selves.

8. Watching Alyssa make funny faces at herself in her spoon.

9. Jake has been saving his money to purchase a certain $80 Lego set and was very excited to finally get it and assemble it.

10.

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Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Kids Say the Funniest Things: Part 8

Things That Make Me Smile has become a favorite on this blog. Even when things have gotten extremely busy and chaotic around here, I do my best to keep them posted. They may not always be up on Fridays, but they do get up. I love having this memorial, both for us and the kids, to look back at over the years. It's important to me to find joy in the little things, to pay attention to my kids, and to fully enjoy this fleeting time. That's what my weekly Smiles is all about.

At the end of the year, I like to have a summary of some of my favorite quotes from the year. Last year, when I had planned to work on my summary, I found myself with a sick little boy in the hospital. I had intended to work on the posts later in the year . . . I just never imagined that later meant a whole year later. Oh well, better late than never.

Without further ado, here is part eight of Kids Say the Funniest Things! This is the first quarter of 2012.

Jake 6, Alyssa 3, Zac 2, Tyler born in March



JANUARY
Jake: "Alyssa, there's one rule you need to know about races - don't cheat."

All 3 kids had been in bed for 10 minutes when Jake got up.  He came out, squinting and rubbing his eyes and said, "I have a question for you . . . about how old I'm going to be in 20 years."

Alyssa: "If the baby's a boy, I'll give it some of my hair so it can be a girl."

Alyssa: "If I fall off the bed and break my head into pieces, I'll just Superglue it back together.

Jake: "I spy with my one little eye something skin-color."
Alyssa: "My skin?"
Jake: "No, but that's a good guess."

Jake, during dinner: "Can I get a pet snake?"
Me: "No."
Jake: "Well then, can I get some mice and a guillotine so I can put the mice in and chop off their heads?"
Me: "And what would you do with the headless mice?"
Jake: "Cook them for dinner! I've never tried mice before."


FEBRUARY
Alyssa, referring to the hardened sugar on top of her crème brûlée: "This is as frozen as a rotten egg!"

We were driving one night when it was sprinkling. The windshield wipers made a "tttthhhhpppttt" sound as they swished one time. Zac said, "Van haffa go potty! Van say "scuse me!"

Me: "Hi, sweetheart."
Zac: "I Zac. I not weetheart."
Me: "Oh, you're Zac?"
Zac: "Yeah. I Zac. You weetheart."

Zac gave me one of Alyssa's baby dolls to hold. A few minutes later, he pulled it from my lap. "No, baby. Dat my seat."

Zac handed me his socks and said, "I don't want my sockies on. I too busy."

Jake: "I weigh almost 60 pounds."
Me: "Hmm, I don't think so."
Jake: "It says 4-0."
Me: "That's 40."
Jake: "I know. I said almost 60."


MARCH
Alyssa: "Jake, you pretend you're sick, and I'm the doctor."
Jake: "I don't want to. I want to pretend I got thrown into a wall"

Me: "Are you going to be a good big brother?"
Zac: "Yes."
Me: "Are you going to help Mommy with the baby?"
Zac: "Um . . . no. Lyssa will."

Me: "Jake, can you please stop talking for 5 minutes?"
Jake: "Sure . . . (4 seconds later) Is a meteor just a piece of rock? Is it hot? Can you touch it? What will happen to you? Hey, watch this! Whoa, that was close! That was so cool! . . . . "

Jake to Alyssa: "God can do anything. He can even turn you into a frog!"

Alyssa: "Is the new baby a boy or a girl?"
Me: "We don't know yet."
Alyssa: "We need Daddy to make an x-ray to see if the baby has long hair or short hair so we'll know if it's a girl or boy."

My mom was pointing out the chickadee in the yard. Zac told her, "No, dat not chicken. Dat birdie."

Zac, pointing to his lips, commanded me: "You! Kiss Me!"

Though Zac has been potty trained for months, he still sleeps in diapers at night. When he woke up, I smelled a less-than-desirable odor. I asked, "Are you stinky?" He replied, "No, I not stinky. Dat my butt stinky."

Alyssa: "Artichokes - do they actually choke you for real?"

Alyssa coughed and cleared her throat. Then she told me, "Sometimes when I lose my voice, I have to work really hard to find it."

Zac was eating an apple and kept bringing me pieces of the peel. He told me, "I don't wike wrapper."


APRIL
Zac was picking out a sucker to eat. He grabbed two, so I told him to put one back. He hid one behind his back, showed me the other hand, and said, "I have one!"

Alyssa came running into the house very excited. "Mom! You have to see something AMAZING! There are dandelions growing everywhere in the yard!!! It's so beautiful!!!"

Jake: "Who's the baddest villain on all the Star Wars?
Me: "Hmm, maybe Darth Vader."
Jake: "I think you're right because he even has his own song to let you know he's coming."

Tyler started squirming around and making little squeaking noises. Alyssa said, "I think the baby's getting an attitude."

Zac asked me to get him something.
Me: "I can't right now. I'm feeding the baby."
Zac: "You need put him 'way!"

I was in the basement and called to Leighton, "Hey, Honey?" He and Zac both responded, "What?" I called back, "Big Honey." Jake came running to the stairs, "What?"

Jake was eating an apple and said, "Ugh, my right side hurts. I think it's filling up just this side instead of both sides." So, he leaned to the left while he finished eating. "There. That's better."

Jake: "I'm not afraid of a shadow. Unless there's something really scary behind it."

Zac: "I don't wike dat"
Me: "Why not? It's fun."
Zac: "I don't wike fun."



Part nine of Kids Say the Funniest Things will be posted soon! Until then, check out parts 1-7 for more funny quotes.


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