Kids Say the Funniest Things: Part 15

Happy New Year! At the beginning of each new year, I love taking the time to reflect on the past. Life is busy raising and schooling 5 little ones. The days are over so fast, and the years are flying by. I try to keep a list of some precious quotes and experiences through my Things That Make Me Smile lists every week. If I don't intentionally record these things, I am prone to forget them. At each new year, I like to review these weekly lists to find some of our very favorite memories. The kids love when I read through these recaps with them. We all sit and laugh together, reminiscing about these special times. It is very precious to me.

As I began to work on the next installment of Kids Say the Funniest Things, I realized that I had never finalized the last one for 2014. The majority of the post was done, but was just needing some formatting and whatnot. Remember what I said about life being busy? Ha. Before I move on to the next year, here are the final months of 2014.  

These were the kids ages at the time recorded: Jake 8, Alyssa 5½, Zac 4, Tyler 1½.

SEPTEMBER

Zac, while watching a cricket and accidentally stepping on it: "I guess my shoes are faster than it!" 

Zac: "That's the stinkiest horse I ever met."

Zac: "Mom, I love you! I just spotted lightning!"
Me: "I love you, too. Lightning reminds you that you love me?"
Zac: "Yep."

Alyssa: "What's a throw pillow?"
Jake: "It's a pillow someone throws so if someone else is falling or something they have some place safe to land."

Jake: "We come from a very important family. Our ancestors were Vikings."
Alyssa: "One of our ancestors was a grandma."

Zac: "Remember when Ty gave me a bloody nose?'
Alyssa: "I remember it like it was yesterday."
Me: "It was yesterday."

Zac: "Mmm, dinner smells good."
Me: "Thank you, but I've barely started cooking yet."
Zac: "It smells cold."

Zac, playing the Wii: "Jake, you're the best boxer in the whole wide world!"
Alyssa: "Other than God."
Zac: "Mmhmm."

Zac: "We have everything except some things."

Jake, about Tyler: "Look at him! He looks like a perfect little boy who never gets into trouble. And then you turn your back . . . and wham! He throws a baseball at a lamp!"

Me: "What?"

Jake: "It's just a figure of speech."

Alyssa: "I like all of them, but my favorites are all of them!"

Jake: "Why do kids shove their toys under the bed?"

Me: "So they don't have to put them away."

Jake: "Nope. To keep the monsters away since there's no room!"

Jake: "As soon as I tasted the cookies (recipe here) I thought, An angel must have brought those down from Heaven."

OCTOBER

Jake: "Mom, I actually sharpened this pencil with my teeth!"

Zac: "May I have a piece of cake now, please? I done all my book."
Me: "You done it? How about you did it?"
Zac: "Yeah, I did done all my book."  

Jake, tasting the cake batter he made: "Mmm, coffee."
Me: "Who are you?"
Jake: "Jacob."
Me: "And since when do you like coffee."
Jake: "Mom, I'm almost 9. I'm going to need to start drinking coffee soon."

Jake: "Is it hazelnut or nasalnut."
Me: "Hazelnut. Do you know what nasal means?"
Jake: "No."
Me: "It's referring to the nose."
Jake: "So, Zac called it a nosenut?"

Me: "I'm going to do it by myself. It's ok if I spend a few minutes by myself every now and then."
Zac: "But you can't be by yourself! We don't want you to get too scared and lonely."

Alyssa: "Your wish is my command."
Me: "Except, it wasn't a wish; it was a command."
Alyssa: "So, your command is my command."
Me: "Exactly."

Zac: "Mom, I think I have fighting muscles! And they're invisible."

Jake: "Mom, can we get a lock for that drawer, please? Tyler's always getting in there. Or, can we just get a lock for him?"

Zac, holding his head after eating ice cream: "I have a giant breeze frain."

Tyler, pulling at his pants trying to fix a wedgie: "My butt stuck!"

Me: "Why are you chewing on your pencil?"
Jake: "Because I'm like a beaver!"

My Mom, about the praying mantis: "That's right, they're carnivores, not herbivores." 
Zac: "Actually, they're insects."

Jake, after we let the praying mantis go: "Aww, I wanted to keep it . . . or at least run it over with my bike."

NOVEMBER
Me: "Why are those clothes shoved in the corner of your room?"

Alyssa: "I put them there for safe keeping."

Zac: "I'm as wise as a bird."

Alyssa: "Mom! Jake's not playing fair! I'm cheating for Zac and Jake is helping him, too!"

Alyssa: "Pink in my favorite color, but purple is my emergency favorite color." 

Alyssa, listening to the southerners singing with a twang at our church: "Mommy, are they like cowboys or something?"   

Me, reading from a book: "What birds live by your house?"
Jake: "Woodpeckers."
Alyssa: "Robins."
Jake: "Blue jays."
Me: "Sparrows, grackles, mourning doves."
Zac: "Regular birds."

Me: "Did you hear me?"
Zac: "Yes, ma'am."
Me: "What did I say?"
Zac: "Uhhh . . . apparently I didn't."

Tyler: "Ty-Ty want someping eat."
Me: "What do you want?"
Tyler: "Um, candy!"
Me: "No." 
Tyler: "On crackers?"

Tyler: "Mommy, I want snack."
Me: "What kind of snack?"
Tyler: "Yellow!"

Alyssa: "I'm burning cold."

DECEMBER
Jake, concerned, while playing Lego Batman 2 on the Wii: "Mom, they're doing a lot of dangerous stuff."

Zac: "What do turkeys say?"
Me: "Gobble, gobble."
Zac, incredulously: "Gobble, gobble? I don't think that's true."

Alyssa: "My teeth itch."
Me: "How do your teeth itch?"
Alyssa, matter-of-factly: "It happens a lot."

Zac: "Knock, knock."
Tyler: "Who's there?"
Zac: "Robot."
Tyler: "I love robots!"
Zac: "No, Ty, you say, 'Robot who?'"
Tyler: "Robot who?"
Zac: "Robot I love you!"
Tyler: "Oh, thank you!"

Alyssa: "I have a mute button."
Jake: "You have a mute button?!? Do you know how many times I could have used that?"

Alyssa: "I'll eat anything! . . . as long as it's yummy."

Zac, holding a popsicle: "That's so cold, my hand would burn to freeze."

Jake: "Tyler is the cutest ever! His cuteness matches his troubleness."

Me, after reading Isaiah 7:14, while discussing names of Jesus: "Do you know what Emmanuel means?" 
Jake: "A guide, you know, like 'a manual.'"

Alyssa, about newborn Nicholas: "He's sleeping and eating! Babies are so talented."

Jake, about Nicholas: "Look how tiny his ears are! They look like mini cookies, you know like the little Oreos in the snack cups."

Jake, about Nicholas: "He's so soft and fuzzy, like a peach."

Me: "What are you doing? You're supposed to be in bed." 
Tyler: "Yeah, I supposed to be kiss this baby."

Jake, about Nicholas: "He's squeaking! Like a trumpet." 

My mom was holding Nicholas and patting his butt, trying to get him to stop fussing. Zac moved her hand, starting patting his butt, and said, "I think I have the right move" as Nicholas stopped crying. 

Zac, about his Christmas ornaments: "Mine are very fragile . . . 'Cause they're hot-glued."

Me: "Nicholas is going to be a week old tomorrow." 
Jake: "Already? It seems like just a few days ago he was a few days old."

Zac, watching me nurse the baby: "So he's eating? Chocolate milk or white milk?"

Jake and Alyssa read portions of the Christmas story before we opened presents on Christmas day. After Alyssa read her verses, Jake leaned over and whispered, "Good job reading. Don't worry, you'll get better at the harder words."

The kids were playing with Nicholas when I came to take him to change his diaper. As I picked him up, Tyler said, "Hey, you no steal that baby!"

Jake: "I had to pick a different Nancy Drew book to read to Nicholas. The other one had ghosts in it, and I didn't want to scare him."


That's all for 2014! I hope to have the next installment of Kids Say the Funniest Things soon. I hope you've Smiled a little as we've reminisced.