The Everyday Family Chore System

Curricula for the kids aren't the only products I get to review as a member of the Homeschool Review Crew. This one from Everyday Homemaking is more for me--and any parent really, not just homeschoolers. One might think that since I'm a full-time, stay-at-home mom that I have this whole thing under control. Ha. While I absolutely love being a homemaker and all that entails (even the cleaning!), I struggle like anyone else to get it all done. That's why it's important to have a system in place for accountability and structure.

I take my role as "mom" very seriously. Not only is it my responsibility to teach my little ones reading, math, and history, it's also my duty to train them in life skills, too. When it comes to working around the house, The Everyday Family Chore System makes it easy to organize the responsibilities. 

As a mother of 8 daughters and a foster mom of almost 50, Vicki Bentley has experience in raising children and teaching them what it means to be a "responsible, caring, sharing part of your family." She wrote this book to help other moms see what worked for her family and to give them the tools necessary to implement the program. The book is broken into the following sections:  

• Introduction
• Part One: Laying a Foundation
• Part Two: Implementing the Plan
• Part Three: The Actual Chore System
• Suggested Resources

In Laying a Foundation, Vicki explains the purpose of her chore system, in that it's meant to train your children to be responsible members of the family that diligently serve one another and to disciple them in life skills. She talks about having the proper expectations, establishing standards, having a working knowledge of family discipline, and showing your kids love.

"If you don't have time to do it right, you sure don't have time to do it over!" 

~ Vicki Bentley

Implementing the Plan gets down to the nitty gritty details. She includes a life skills checklist that acts as a guideline for training children. Each age from 2-teens has a list of possible skills in which you might begin to train the child to do. In parentheses after each skill is the age which the child might be able to complete the task on his own. For example, you might choose to start teaching a 3-year-old how to dust furniture, but he might not be able to properly do it on his own until age 9. Or you may train a 7-year-old to clean the bathroom, but he may not fully hone the skill until he is 12. She is very clear that this list is simply a guideline to help you, not to be followed strictly. Each child is different and has different abilities. As an example, she lists baking a cake and making pancakes starting at age 10 and being fully capable by ages 14 and 16 respectively. In our home, both of those skills are reached on their own, years before her suggested age of 10. It is a lengthy list that includes more than cooking and cleaning, as there are skills such as building a fire, filling out a job application, changing flat tires, planning a workable budget, and much more.

In this section, she also describes the plan and gives suggestions of ways to set it up. She even has many tips you can implement to help your kids succeed, like having a routine, having a place for everything, labeling, making your home child-friendly, and others.

Part three is The Actual Chore System, meaning it contains printable cards for your system. There are individual card labels that name the jobs. They include the most common family chores and then there are several empty labels so you can customize your list for your own family.

There are also How-To-Do-It Cards that correspond to the majority of the jobs and a few extras. These 3x5 cards explain step-by-step how the task should be accomplished. This ensures that the child does a thorough job and does not forget any steps. It also acts as accountability so he can't claim that he didn't know a specific portion needed to be done. Some of the cards have blank spaces so you can fill in your chosen cleaner. I laminated all of my cards for stability and chose to do so without the blanks filled in. This way, if I decide to change my cleaner, I won't need to replace the card. I simply write on the laminated card with an overhead transparency marker, or a wet-erase marker. This way, the ink is semi-permanent, but can easily be changed with a little water and cloth.  

There are many different ways you can put the system together. I chose to use a plastic pocket chart that I used during my teaching-in-the-classroom days many years ago. This was incredibly simply to use, because once I had my cards printed, cut, and laminated, all I had to do was fill the pockets. The chart can stand up on its own, or I can collapse it to hide it away. There is also a large velcro pocket in the inside that I use to store the How-To-Do-It cards that are part of the weekly jobs in the chart.

As far as the other cards, I keep those in a 3x5 card box. Those are the jobs that don't need to be completed as often. We use these tasks for various things: weekly job from box, disciplinary purposes, seasonal cleaning, ect..

"Don't put it down; put it away!" ~ Vicki Bentley

I have seen many variations of chore charts over the years, but never one quite like this. This one isn't simply a list of age-appropriate tasks and a way to organize them, but includes valuable information explaining exactly how the child should complete them. The How-To-Do-It cards make this system stand out above the rest.

My kids are doing very well with this format. It's easy to keep track of the chores for the week and helps them to see what they need to do. They especially like doing the jobs from the box and often ask if they can do extras! We'll see how long that enthusiasm for extra chores lasts, ha.

Vicki also wrote a cookbook with tried-and-true recipes that we reviewed years ago. She is currently offering 10% off the Everyday Family Chore System and Everyday Cooking with coupon code TOS10books through September 5. The code is good for both the printed and digital versions.

You can connect with Everyday Homemaking on Facebook or the website.

If you'd like to read more reviews of the chore system or check out some reviews of the cookbook, please visit the Homeschool Review Crew blog.

H is for Home

Home.

The very word brings a sense of comfort.

Peace.

Contentment.

I almost think I would hole up and become a hermit if I could.

Oh, it's not that I don't like people. I'm a big people-person. It's just that home is where I find the people I love the most. You know the saying home is where the heart is?  Yep. There is truly no place else I'd rather be. Ninety-percent of my life is spent here. And I wouldn't want it any other way.

What's so great about being home?

Homemaking

I love homemaking. Really. I am one of those people that enjoy cooking, baking, cleaning and organizing. Sure, things can get overwhelming at times, but I enjoy it none-the-less. (Except shampooing carpets. I despise shampooing the carpets. Which reminds me, they need to be cleaned. Any takers???)  

We lived with my parents for nearly 4 years after we got married. We finished up our bachelor degrees that first year and then started saving for a house. Because of various reasons, we didn't find the one until many years later. We got along great with my parents during those years though. Like I've said before, they are our best friends. Since we didn't have a place of our own, I couldn't justify staying home all day. After getting my degree, I went back to my own alma mater and taught for 3 years. Jake was born during that time, and though it was the desire of my heart to be a stay-at-home-mommy, we still did not have our own house. We eventually found the house we now live in, got the keys the end of March, and I officially became a SAHM the end of May. It's been 5 years since then. Five wonderful, fulfilling years. I know that some women have no desire to stay home every day. Some consider cleaning a chore. Some do not enjoy being in the kitchen. That is not me. I know 100 % that I was meant to be a stay-at-home mom. I honestly love making my house a home.

Homebirthing

Had you told me 6 years ago that I was going to birth my babies at home, I would have laughed. I had absolutely no desire to homebirth. I had preconceived ideas about it -- none of which really were good. So, how did I go from no-way-would-I-ever-homebirth to no-way-would-I-ever-not-want-to-homebirth? Good question.

While in the hospital with Jake, I labored a little in the bathtub. Sure, I had heard of waterbirths before, (I watched my fair-share of TLC birthing shows) but I never considered having one myself. When I got pregnant again a year-and-a-half later, I remembered that bathtub and how much relief it brought. I started researching waterbirths. I decided that was what I wanted and began checking the hospitals in the area. At the time, there were many that allowed the mother to labor in a birthing tub that she brought with her, but there was only one hospital in all of Michigan that allowed the baby to actually be delivered in the tub. (There are other places now.) My only options were to drive 3 hours to that hospital or find a midwife. Ha, a midwife. Yeah, right, I thought, but there was no way I was driving across the state just to have a waterbirth. I continued to learn. I continued to study. I eventually did a search for midwives in my area. I found that the closet one to me was only about 10 minutes away. Leighton and I talked about it. I eventually called, not knowing yet what my decision was. Within the first few minutes of that hour-long conversation, I knew that I would have my baby at home and that I was talking to my midwife. Immediately, I felt so comfortable with her. We had the same philosophy about birth. We shared the same thinking about procedures. No more would I have to fight the doctors about what I wanted for my baby and me. I found someone that recognized the ability God gave to women's body for the very purpose of birthing babies. I spent the next few months learning about homebirth. I was amazed by how things have been done for thousands of years and how technology has changed the birthing process the past few years.      

I know that homebirthing is not for everyone, but it was definitely for me. I have loved, loved, loved having my babies at home. I really cannot say that enough. The benefits alone are enough for another post. We've already written about the 3 births: Alyssa whose labor was only 90 minutes and was probably the most perfect birth ever; Zac whose labor was 45 minutes total and happened so fast his daddy almost missed it; and Tyler whose labor was 2 hours long, surprised everyone, and made the most perfect birthday present for his sister. Homebirth has been a huge blessing.

Homeschooling

When Leighton and I got married, we knew we were going to homeschool. I'm not really sure why we made that decision, if you can even call it a decision. It was just a given. Neither of us were homeschooled, so I don't know why it was the plan. All I know is that we knew that it was what God wanted. That was reason enough for us.

The summer before we officially starting homeschooling though, is when it really hit. I was going to be doing the teaching. I was going to be responsible for their learning. I would be doing all the schooling. I started to get scared, but God used a book to calm my fears. Sure, there are times when it gets tough. There are times I wonder if I'm teaching them like I should. There are times when things get hectic. But I know that this is His will for us. I'm so thankful for this opportunity to teach my kids, to spend every day raising them to serve God, to show them continually just how much I love them. I am honored that God gave me the responsibility and privilege of educating my children. I have learned so much through teaching them. I am so blessed for this opportunity to homeschool.


Homemaking, homebirthing, homeschooling. Home. It's what I do. And I wouldn't have it any other way.     

Tough Decisions

Have you ever felt like you were drowning?

Like your responsibilities were multiplying and you were always in over your head. No matter how much you worked to stay afloat, things kept weighing you down and making you sink.

That's where I am.

It just seems like we have so many extra stuff going on lately. Reorganizing our schoolroom. Preparing baby clothes to sell at a mom-to-mom. Preparing maternity clothes to drop off at a consignment store. Gathering toys to be sold. Filling boxes with everything else to donate.

Reorganizing.

Simplifying.

We've accumulated so much stuff over the years. Stuff that we have no room for. Stuff that clutters the house. Stuff that sucks up time. Stuff that makes me stressed.

One of the fastest ways to stress me out is having a mess. Oh, I'm not talking about messes that serve a purpose or aftermaths from a project. Messes from creating oobleck and learning about states of matter, messes from making homemade Oreo cookies and enjoying their yumminess, messes from transforming an experiment into a whole new process and experiencing the joy of learning.

These messes I encourage. These messes make for a rich, learning environment. These messes help my kids to explore and grow and discover.

No, I'm talking about lazy messes. Toys scattered around the house. Clothes sitting in a pile. Dishes left on the table. Papers and crayons cluttering the floor.

Lately, I feel pushed to the max. Keeping up with my chores - the laundry, the cooking, the obsession to make everything from scratch, the cleaning, the dishes, the picking up, the putting away, the changing the diapers, the nursing, the clipping the coupons, the buying the groceries, the sweeping, the vacuuming. The everything in between. Keeping up with the schooling - the teaching, the explaining, the helping with work, the activities, the crafts, the experiments, the reading. Lots and lots of reading.  Keeping up with the kids completing their chores - the clothes, the craft supplies, the toys. Oh, the toys.

I know I am not the only one to ever have 4 little kids. And homeschool. And try to keep a clean home. And have home-cooked meals. And. And. And. That's how I feel. Like there's always another and.

I've been self-examining lately. Scrutinizing my life. Contemplating what I can change to get me out of this drowning scenario.

Blogging.

Blogging is the one area I feel I can neglect. I don't think my family would accept a hiatus from the laundry. Or a break from cooking. But blogging I can cut back and still care for my family. I made this decision last week and figured I should explain why I've been absent. I hate having to do this. I hate that I haven't been consistent. I feel like we're losing something, forgetting something in our lives if we can't look back on it years from now.

Just writing that seems kinda silly. But it's how I feel. I've gotten better about accepting the fact that I've been hit or miss with posts lately, but it still bothers me. Like I said last week though, my family must come first.

So, what does that mean for the blog? Well, my plan is to keep up with blogging through the alphabet on (hopefully) Mondays, post a quick pic from the week on Wednesdays, and share our Smiles on Fridays. Of course, I have a few reviews for TOS left before the year ends in November.

Doesn't really seem like cutting back much? For now I won't be worrying about posting crafts on Mondays, trying to type up recipes on Tuesdays, or rushing to share experiments on Thursdays. I'm not sure how long this will last. I do know that it's necessary though, at least until I can catch up on the extras.

Bear with me, please? I don't know how I'll ever get caught up, if I'll ever get caught up. I currently have 30-something drafts going right now, and lots more floating around in my head. Ultimately though, 20 years down the road, my kids won't care if I never shared that everyone-raves-about-this recipe. They will, however, remember if I took the time to care for them.

Correction: they will remember that I did take the time to care for them.